Trio

Looking for the latest Trio blog post? You’ll have to go to the new Trio! 

 http://fcdtrio2.blogspot.com/

Today marks the final day of National Blog Posting Month.  I never formally accepted the challenge, and even didn’t think that I would try.  But, I was slightly intrigued and decided to attempt what seemed initially inconceivable.  In the end, there will be 43 Trio posts for the month of November, including at least one every day.  I am glad that it is over, but I am also very glad I did it.  As I reflected on each day, I realized how special each day really is.  I am still struggling to find balance with three children.  Some days are good, others not so good.  And, while some are more of a learning experience than others, each is a gift.  My Trio is amazing.  They make me smile, cry, and laugh out loud.  When the house is quiet, and I begin to reflect and blog, it becomes so apparent how blessed I am.  What a wonderful way to end each day!

Franny and Cole are outside every chance they can get.  And if Daddy is outside, that is the best combination and they will definitely be with him if at all possible.  Throw in a leaf blower and things really can’t get much better.  Franny and Cole joined Rick outside this morning as he cleared the enormous drifts of leaves from our yard.  They held on as long as they could, but wet shoes, socks, feet, and clothing finally drove them inside.  They wanted to be outside, but the elements just proved too much for them.   Once dry and warm, they took a birds eye view at the kitchen window to watch the ongoing progress.  It wasn’t where they wanted to be, but it was their closest alternative.

5:45 pm: we arrive at Uncle Lyman and Auntie M’s for dinner; there are yummy hors d’oeuvres—baked oysters, veggies, chips, salsa, dips. Cole eats a few chips, but is more interested in running around and causing trouble.

6:45 pm: we have a delicious dinner of pork loin and mushrooms, asparagus, and mashed potatoes. Cole has a few bites of pork, but is soon on his way running around, again.

7:15 pm: we have dessert—a choice of cookies, ice cream, or chocolate cake. Cole opts out on the entire selection. More running around ensues.

7:45 pm: I give the kids the heads up that we are leaving in five minutes.

7:50 pm: Cole decides that dinner is too good to pass up and starts eating several helpings of pork.

8:20 pm: Cole finishes and we finally depart for home.

We are probably too accommodating when it comes to Cole’s eating habits. If he didn’t eat with us at the appropriate time, the kitchen should have ‘closed’ and he should have had the chance to learn that he needs to eat at dinner time or be hungry later. For us, however, it’s difficult to impose that lesson on Cole, when he really could use to gain a few additional pounds. It’s definitely something that we need to learn to manage better in the future. But for tonight, it was so great to see him eat so much…

I am sure that it isn’t easy for Franny being the eldest of three young kids. Although she is only four years old, sometimes I think we treat her as if she is much older, expecting her to always behave in a model way, help out with her siblings, and always be the one who has to wait. She is growing up so fast and becomes more and more capable every day. Too frequently we get stuck in ‘survival mode’ where we just try to get through the day with everyone happy and stress-free, where I don’t introduce her to as many new things as I could. And, I definitely don’t spend as much one-on-one time with her as I would like. Fortunately, she has a Grandma that can recognize when she needs a little time special for just her. Today, Franny and Grandma made a special snack together for everyone to enjoy. It was very simple—dried fruits and nuts, but set up so she could measure and stir, and have fun doing something different that she could share with everyone. It was obvious she was so pleased with it all. Very simple but very special. It’s so wonderful that she has a Grandma that just knows. There is no question that Thanksgiving is a special day, but for Franny, I think the day after was just as special. Unquestionably, it was full of all the thoughtfulness and spirit the holiday represents.

Swings from T on Vimeo.

Franny and Cole always have a great time when they visit Grandma and Grandpa’s house, and they never have any shortage of things to do.  But, with Grandpa always thinking of them and trying to make things even more fun (if this is possible), the result is this wonderful swing set, complete with three swings, including a bucket seat that I know Delaney will love next Spring.  Construction didn’t finish until the weather had already turned cooler, but it has still has provided some fun times during some of the warmer days we’ve had, as well as some not-so-warm days, like today, where it just couldn’t be resisted.  And, of course, Grandpa is out there enjoying it with them, which makes it so much more fun.  Is it any wonder they adore their Grandpa? You know it’s special when you can see and feel memories in the making.  I love times like these.

I know it’s chilly outside when Cole moves from his standard bare feet to fuzzy Elmo slippers. I can’t think of anything cozier to warm cold toes.

It’s not easy for Franny and Cole to understand what it really means to give thanks. They have everything they need, and always have. Someday I know they will be thankful for our wonderful family. Having always had these relationships, however, they really can’t conceptualize what it would be like not to have them. We’ve talked about what being thankful means, but without that perspective, some of the meaning is inevitably lost. Their understanding will come with experience, I know. And, while it is important to recognize the blessings in our lives, right now I am thankful they don’t understand what it means not to have love, family, a home, or food. No child should. One of the difficult things about children getting older, is that you can begin to foresee that someday they will be hurt, lonely, and go through challenging times. And, those experiences will shape them as much as the positive forces that we try to provide for them. But, for now, I am thankful that they are innocent and carefree and don’t have to understand all that yet.

Never been lonely
Never been lied to
Never had to scuffle in fear
Nothing denied to
Born at the instant
The church bells chime
And the whole world whispering
Born at the right time

--Paul Simon

One night a week we all have ice cream for dessert. Well, everyone but Cole. He prefers to have just a cone. Silly boy.

At Delaney’s age, Franny wore these cute little jeans. With Delaney quickly outgrowing many of her clothes, I pulled these out thinking they would be a perfect fit. The length was just right, but the waist was inches too big for her teeny middle. Like Cole, she is very lean, but rather than a long torso she has long legs. This combination makes for a tough fit when it comes to baby pants. Too bad, since we have so many great hand-me-downs from Franny. I think Delaney is going to be in leggings for many months to come.

Pants’ real waist and  Delaney’s waist

Cole and I started to do puzzles together a couple of months ago. He has always been intrigued when Franny does hers, and I wanted to add another activity for us to do together when we have our one-on-one time. It was a little slow at first—he wanted to do Franny’s harder puzzles, and with those appropriate for him, he didn’t seem to really understand what he should be doing. He’d get a few pieces together, while I did most of it. But, he enjoyed it, so we continued. After a couple of weeks, it was like a light went on. He started putting together more and more pieces, and now he can complete a 24-38 piece puzzle almost by himself. Now, when Franny is gone, that is what he wants to do. I love to watch him and listen to him as he talks himself through it: I need to turn it…this matches this…that doesn’t go there! And, my favorite—I did it!

Cole and Franny are unquestionably very close.  On most days, they have more fun together than apart, and refer to each other as ‘best friends’.  The last couple of weeks, however, there has been a rise in the amount of bickering between them.  I suppose it is natural—all relationships have their moments of tension, and every individual has their good and bad days.   But, it is not fun to listen to and I always worry about hurt feelings.  My concern is probably unnecessary, as they make up even quicker than they clash.  And so far, I have yet to see any long term or on-going conflicts emerge.  But, I still don’t like it!

…she’s sleeping again! At last—these beautiful smiles are those of a well rested baby! Delaney has been sleeping so much better over the last four nights. She does still roll over onto her stomach, but it is no longer causing her to wake up. She’s has been up twice a night, but that is an enormous improvement over the last few weeks, and almost back where she was a few months ago. We hope it lasts!

Franny loves dress up. Whether it is Cinderella or Sleeping Beauty, ladybugs and butterflies, or just variations of her regular wardrobe, it doesn’t matter—her tremendous imagination can create costumes out of practically anything. Today, she was Fairy Franny. She asked me when I planned on wearing my costume again. When I told her that I dress up only once a year, she wasn’t too impressed. Maybe I should start looking for some fairy wings for me…

And, of course, Cole is a regular and most willing participant in her play…

Don’t let this ‘too cool for pictures’ look fool you—Franny was very excited to attend her Harvest feast at school.  When given the option of this 45 minute turkey dinner or go to playgroup, she emphatically chose the party.

So, I signed up to bring cranberries (the easy option, I know, but I did make them), Rick blocked out his schedule to attend, and we all went to the big feast.   She proudly wore her turkey hat, which she had made earlier in the week, and she chose her menu very carefully.  Not what I would have chosen, but it is her feast and she should be able to feast on what she wants.

But, the big eater award must go to Cole, who had two large helpings of turkey and an entire piece of ham.  He also had a good time at the big feast.

All in all, it was a fun little party for Franny and her classmates.  She has begun to form a circle of friends and is really enjoying her new class and everything they are learning.  I was happy to see her take such an interest in her school party and have such a good time.

Delaney has graciously shared her bedroom with us for the last five months. It’s been part office-part storage room-part Delaney room. But it is now for her and her alone. Her recent sleeping challenges led me to the decision to tackle this transition in tandem with keeping her in a sustainable sleep position. And, in the process, hopefully reduce the number of sleepless nights in our future. So far, it seems to not be a non-issue. She actually seems to be more comfortable there, and she did seem to sleep a little better last night. Maybe tonight we’ll all get some solid rest.

There aren’t many babies that sleep as well as we would like them to. It is always an encouraging sign when they are able to roll over on their own, so if they do roll over in their sleep, you can actually leave them there and hopefully enjoy a couple of additional hours of sleep. But, then there’s Delaney. Saturday night she started rolling over in her sleep. Rather than prolonging a blissful slumber, this process wakes her up and in a most unhappy mood. I’m not sure why she doesn’t just roll back over, but this new development doesn’t just happen two or three times a night. Six or seven times would be more accurate. We’re all tired, and ironically, I am trying to think of ways to keep her on her back. We’ll see what tonight brings. She went to bed two hours ago and she’s already been up once. That’s really not a good sign.

Cole really is reaching the age where a messy face just doesn’t seem as endearing as it once did. There are few foods, however, that Cole really likes; and, even fewer that he will eat in any significant quantity. Today, cottage cheese even beat out his favorite mozzarella. If you can believe it, this 16 oz cottage cheese container was unopened prior to lunch today. Now, that’s a good lunch! Tomorrow, I’m sure he will eat next to nothing…

I don’t think there is any question anymore—the rainy season is finally here.  Although I know they would rather be playing outside, Franny and Cole haven’t seemed to mind moving their play time indoors.  Now, the only question seems to be how to keep them dry.  We waited a little too long to shop for rain gear and inventories are currently slim to none.  This weekend, however, they returned home from grocery shopping with new umbrellas.  They were very excited about them, especially the ever fashion conscious Franny.  She’s still asking about her coat and boots, but these seem to have bought me a little time.

Franny loves being a big sister to Delaney. Unfortunately, I am certain she gets frustrated and a little discouraged when we are continuously having to tell her to get D a little space. Franny likes to get nose to nose with her, and give her lots of hugs and kisses, which is fine on occasion, but it gets to be a little much sometimes—especially when you add Cole’s exuberant affection into the mix. A five month old Delaney just gets a little overwhelmed with all that love. I know that Delaney loves Franny as much as Franny does her—it’s quite obvious when you see them together; and, as dear as they are now, I can’t wait until they are able to interact on a new level. Too sweet!

Delaney's new sounds from T on Vimeo.

A little over two months later, and Delaney is already looking much more at ease as part of the gang.  This is great to see, because they really do love her so.  Of course, the real test will be when she is able to crawl away…

August—Delaney 2 and a half months

November—Delaney almost 5 months

We bought Franny her new bed a little over a year ago.  However, we didn’t set up the upper bunk until today.  She was very excited and also had a lot of fun helping set it up.  In order to give her a little more room, we moved her furniture around and even removed her bookcase.  So now, she has a whole new room, and she spent her afternoon “decorating” it.  Soon, we will really decorate it anew, but one step at a time.  For now, both Franny and Cole are having a great time going up and down the ladder, hanging out on the top bunk, and giggling non-stop.  So much fun!

Each of Cole's gymnastics classes ends with the kids doing a cheer. It's really too cute, and even though it's not skill-based, it's still one of my favorite things they do...

Cheer from T on Vimeo.

Tonight, Cole got a huge kick out of Grandma and Grandpa’s digital frame.  He watched the rotation of pictures countless times, announcing who was in the picture with each advance.  It’s Franny!  Cole and Grandma!  Franny and Daddy!  His excitement over it all was nothing less than hilarious.  He’s so much fun—I just can’t get enough of him!

It’s Franny!

A stomach virus hit our house pretty hard this week.  Monday, Franny and I succumbed to the bug, Tuesday it was Rick’s turn, and then today, Franny relapsed.  Everyone was feeling good as of bedtime, and I am just hoping that is the end of it.  So much cleaning and disinfecting has been tedious—in this month to be thankful, I can say I am extremely thankful for the steam cleaner, the ‘sanitize’ setting on the washing machine, and of course, what is usually a healthy household.  In a year that has been typified as ‘anything goes’, there are only three things that we do our best not to compromise:  family, health, and  happiness.  A nasty bug definitely visited our house this week, but we sent it packing.  Too bad it isn’t always that easy!

There is no limit to the amount of baby gear available for infants:  bouncers, swings, high chairs, the list goes on and on.  I really dislike all his equipment—it is usually large, bulky, plastic, and rarely the kind of stimulation I think is really appropriate for infants—they frequently seem to be an onslaught of annoying ‘‘music” and bells and whistles designed to function as a substitute caregiver.  That said, there is a point where the unpredictable sleep schedule of a baby also requires a place to put them when necessary.  I can’t put Delaney on the floor when I take a shower, I can’t hold her while I make meals, and sometimes I just need a break.  This collapsible travel swing serves as my ‘helper’ upstairs and a bouncer and highchair serve the same purpose downstairs.  She doesn’t really like either, but tolerates them for enough time for me to take care of various routine things throughout the day.  I look forward to the day when I can donate and discard these things.  Until then, I continue to remind myself that these are just a few of the insignificant little things that come with babies, but are temporary and will eventually be gone from sight. 

Delaney used to sleep so soundly. But, up just once during the night has evolved into up every two to three hours. It has been going on long enough that we know it is not a temporary phase—it is our norm. One of the reasons for the change is probably due to her irregular nap schedule during the second half of the summer. Her lack of recuperative sleep is most likely manifesting itself with night wakings. So, we have begun to prioritize her sleep schedule, in attempts to try and consolidate her 4 short naps during the day into 2 long naps, as well as extending her durations of night sleep. She’s still little, and needs to get up to eat during the night. This current schedule, however, will be the end of us all if it continues, and isn’t healthy for Delaney, either. We’re two weeks into it, and old habits are definitely hard to break, but I think we’re starting to see some change. Now, she down to three naps and has been up only twice during the last two nights. I am definitely hoping that this a new pattern emerging. We’ll see…